https://preview.redd.it/pawtxxgwjqg61.png?width=1603&format=png&auto=webp&s=2294192be6ffb378562ea0d69d30fc3c89ffcdb3 submitted by Alexpixar to u/Alexpixar [link] [comments] As we all know today, The Walt Disney Company succeeded in acquiring 21st Century Fox in 2019, which resulted in 20th Century and Searchlight to become part of the Disney family. However in 2020, the closure of Disney parks during the COVID-19 pandemic made Disney lose the company $1.4 billion and another $2.8 billion of revenue in November, and the company is planning to lay off 32,000 employees until March 2021. So what if Apple had a better chance to acquire the House of Mouse for $275 billion on August 6, 2022. (Even though Steve Jobs died of pancreatic cancer at the age of 56 on October 5, 2011.) If Apple buys out The Walt Disney Company, here's what might happen in the future.
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We just lost my little brother to suicide less than a month ago. He was struggling to find happiness and was hurting after the end of a relationship, but we never expected him to take his life. He shot himself in the master bathroom of my parents' home. My mother is understandably traumatized, but she also is often asking the why and what-if questions. Whether she was a good mother, if she could have changed things, what she might have done differently that morning. Lots of questions that, frankly, we will probably never know the answer to. The issue is, these questions keep her in a state of mind that doesn't allow her to move forward. And she's trapped herself in a mindset which resulted in inpatient treatment for severe anxiety in the past worrying herself to death. How can I nudge her away from that place and those questions? How do I help her grieve in a way that helps her heal and begin to move forward? | This is definitely a scenario where I am going to beg you to get a therapist involved asap - preferably one who specializes in trauma. There are so many layers of grief and trauma you and your parents have been through. I can’t even begin to scratch the surface in a comment. A good therapist will be able to dive into your story, learn more about each of you, your history, your character, your communication styles, and more to help give you specific guidance through the days and months ahead. I am so sorry. My heart is broken for your family. My chest hurt reading this. One of my good friends lost her sibling to suicide earlier this year and it’s devastating. |
If you’re a reader, one of my favorite books on trauma is The Body Keeps The Score, which offers insight on healing from trauma. I truly am sending so much love to you and hope you can find the right support to help you and your mom with her anxiety and fear. | |
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My parents are speaking to counselors and participating in support groups, yes. I just wanted to know if there was anything I could do, personally, to help her accept that she's not to blame. Thank you. | I’m so glad to hear you have counseling support and hope that trauma support is a part of that. As far as personal support, I go with my gut and my heart for moments of support... Sometimes my heart will guide me to say something specific. Other times I will feel like I am supposed to stay quiet and just be present. I think a big part of support is being able to see the other person’s state of being and know how to best love them wherever they are. |
So much of support is loving - and so much of loving is knowing. Because I don’t know your mom, I don’t feel like I can really help with specifics. But maybe you can start by asking her, “how can I love you best right now?” That’s usually where I start... | |
My sister is in the final stages of bone cancer. She is in her 40s with young children. Our entire family is grieving and so is my sister. Her life will be cut short and all of it feels massively unfair. Do you have any suggestions on ways to help her as she attempts to cope with her grief? She doesn’t have much time left. I just want to be there for her in any way possible. | I am so sorry. Bone cancer is awful and facing your own death is incredibly challenging. I walked a friend through stage 4 lung cancer and he was in his 50s. One way that I helped him is that I would bring him anti-inflammatory foods and tea, I would sit with him alone in the house when he was resting just so he would have company or someone to call if he needed help, and I was also willing to ask him hard questions, like, “are you afraid to die?” |
We would sit and cry together. He had some religious questions but wasn’t able to get out of the house hardly, so I asked a pastor to come over and talk with him. I would make it known that he and his partner could call on me any time day or night and I would be there. I did my best to create a safe space for him to share anything he needed to share and just to let him know he was loved and not alone. | |
I know you don’t have a lot of time left, but one thing you might want to look into is Saga to help your sister record some memories to preserve so your family can listen to them after she’s gone. | |
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My heart goes out to anyone with an ill loved one. My sweet father in law is sick with an incurable brain tumor. We can’t spend time with him during this time and we want the connection so much. I found Saga and it just brings me so much relief and happiness to hear my father in law’s stories recorded for his children and grandchildren. He is so happy to pick up the app and answer random and varied questions and hearing his voice makes me well up with tears of joy. I wish I had Saga when my grandparents passed away 10 years ago so my kids could have heard more about what life was like a long time ago. | Thank you so much for sharing ♥️ |
Have you thought of working with the Order of the Good Death? | Never heard of it - what is it all about? |
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The Order of the Good Death is a death acceptance organization founded in 2011 by mortician and author Caitlin Doughty. The group advocates for natural burial and embracing human mortality. I think your goals would match up well. Death and Grief are linked and you probably have a perspective members would like to hear. | That’s awesome. Thank you! I will check it out. My husband and I chose a natural burial for our daughter. |
This is really awesome - I am on the Order of a Good Death website now and it reminds me so much of Caleb Wilde and his book Confessions of a Funeral Director. His website. | |
Thank you so much for sharing this 🙏♥️ | |
I know you’re likely off this ama, but I’m just very interested in the topic of grief. My question is: how can I make others understand that my anticipatory grief at the impending loss of my dog is a valid grief? In the U.S. anyway, bereavement leave from work is a sham that varies from place to place and state to state, but never seems to last longer than a week. And for pets or best friends, those losses aren’t considered under paid bereavement leave. But when my dog dies, I honestly can’t imagine functioning again for a very long time. However, it seems like others (or workplaces, at least) do not validate that loss as grief. | Still here! I’ve been touching base all day so thanks for your question - it’s a really important topic and grief policies are something we are working on as a part of our corporate care program. Bereavement leave on average is three paid days... which means that if I lost my daughter on a Monday, I would be expected back at work on Friday. THAT IS INSANE. |
As far as pets, I also agree that those losses are not taken seriously, even though many of us view our pets as family members. I had a dog from age 5 to 21 - she was like a sister growing up and helped me through my parents divorce. I was a mess when she died and I totally understand your concern. | |
Have you had any conversations with your boss? Do you have any PTO time you can take if you don’t get bereavement leave? | |
Grief sucks. This is crazy i was just thinkign about grief. I miss my dad. I miss my grandma, she was like my mom because she literally was.. Its just so fucked up. Sometimes you wont have any emotion around the death of ur loved one, then itll hit you like a fucking plane. Im only 15 bruhbut these emotions are intense. MY grandpa i live with is coughing 24/7, hes sleeping more, and eating less, and his grammar is more poor. Hes already had multiple srtokes. My dad overdosed and died earlier this year on july. My grandma died when i was 10. I mean seomtimes I just stop giving a fuck and look up to god and try and just let him control because last time I did he didnt do me wrong... but.. Its just missing the feeling you had when you were with that person.. Missing the way you used to view the world when they were still alive.. Missing the way you used to think, operate, and how different things were when they were alive. Then you consider that they if they were depresesd as fuck, or if they were ur parent, they prolly went through what you went through when they were your age, which just makes it worse. But the hardest part? Accepting thtat they arent coming back... Coping with that god awful "empty" feeling of pain in your chest.... Because they really arent coming back.. You cant hug them, talk to them, ask for advice, create/ new memories, and thinking about old memories becomes hard because of the emotion it brings, especially if you have some sort of mental issues such as depression or bipolar or stuff around that spectrum.. I just think in my head... Is heaven real? I think it is personally but if it is... IS my grandma talking to her son (my dad) up there? ITs so sad. I hope that my dad can rejoice and get the happiness he never could, and talk to my grandma... I really do hope so. I just want him to hvae a conversation with my grandma, bceause Im sure that he missed his mom more than anything while he was still alive. Its the shit like this that creates a drug dealegang-bangeprisoneserial killer. Im just worried for my future... Im alreaedy failing high shcool... Fuck dude.. Why am I dealing with these emotions at this age. .Why? Why am i put through this. I really love the lord jesus christ. I love him. I would die for him if he vividily and as clear as he ever could told me that I had to die to prove I love him. Please. Every christian, and catholic here, pray for my grandpa. Please. Yall can already imagine how I feel. How... Just how do I accept my dads death.. It just aint fucking right. Its not. NOt one fuckin bit. | To be 15 and going through what you are going through, I have mad respect for you that you’re here and wanting to heal. I’m sorry for the many losses you’ve experienced in such a short time. Your words “coping with that golf awful ‘empty’ feeling in your chest” resonate with me - that feeling is so real! Do any of your teachers know what you’ve gone through or what you’re currently dealing with at home? I lost my aunt, who I was extremely close with, while I was in college. In my personal experience, any time I would go to a teacher I trusted to share my struggles, they were understanding and cut me some slack - some even offered to help with resources or connections. I believe most teachers are good humans with big hearts - they’re certainly not there for the money. |
Your school might also have a counselor on site that you can talk to for free if that interests you... If not, they might be able to help you find someone. | |
As far as your belief in Jesus, I asked some similar questions when my 21 months old daughter died in my arms at the age of 27. I don’t know if this will help in any way, but some answers that I landed on is that Jesus’ life was full of suffering. A Christian isn’t promised an easy life full of happiness, in fact, it’s almost the opposite. And it was actually in the suffering (as my daughter’s illness progressed and she became closer to death) that I felt closest to God. That didn’t make it any easier - it still sucked and was the worst pain I’ve ever felt. And I do find comfort that my daughter is with my aunts, grandparents, and other relatives on the other side. I also believe that they can still love us from the other side. | |
I’m happy to share more if you want to hear it or stay connected outside of this Reddit if you want to talk more. Your future isn’t doomed and you’re not alone. There is hope and I am happy to help you as much as I can. | |
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first&foremost DM me so I can keep contact. But its just kinda hard knowing that if they are up there (i beleive that they are tho) and watching over me, they saw all the gross stuff ive done, eman stuff, illegal stuff, and etc... I mean I hang with gang members, if i was caught i couldve been a felon more tiems I can count, im failing in life... They aint proud. I want to have the strength to have the will to do schoolwork, i rly do. You ever think about them wtaching over u doing all ur stuff they wouldnt be proud of, and then kidna.. cringe to say the least | Sent a DM 👍 |
I have dealt with a lot of guilt in feeling grief. When my biological father died, I felt guilty for grieving because we weren't super close throughout my life (though I was with him when he passed). My oldest sister (his daughter from a previous marriage) just died on December 4th and I have been grieving so much for her even though we never met in person...and because of this I feel incredibly guilty and like I don't deserve to grieve. What would you suggest to help people with that feeling of guilt to be able to allow themselves that needed period of grief? | I first want to acknowledge that you experienced a loss and your grief is valid in both scenarios. You absolutely deserve to grieve and if you’re body is grieving, it’s working with you to feel those feeling and heal. |
Do you feel guilty because of judgement coming from within or because of judgement from others? Regardless, it’s important to realize that not all voices you hear are voices you should listen to. | |
Listen to your body, give yourself permission to feel without judgement, and let yourself grieve ♥️ | |
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I'm feeling the judgment from within. Everyone I'm close to has kind of just forgotten about it I guess (especially my sister's death) because I've only grieved in private and have thrown myself into being busy and working hard to keep it at bay. Thank you for your sentiments and advice. ❤️ | You’re welcome. And you may not be alone. A lot of people grieve in private because they think it’s not acceptable to talk about. So you may think others have moved on, when in reality they may actually be processing still in private too... |
I lost my grandmother 6 months ago. My father blames himself that he couldn't do much to save her. How do I help my dad through this guilt? | Oh man, my heart hurts for you and your dad. It’s so hard when people blame themselves. I would consult a counselor or therapist for support. They’ll be able to get more of a backstory, understand who your dad is and how he communicates, learn who you are and how you communicate, and guide you through the process of those interactions. A good therapist can be such a treasure in the healing journey. |
If you don’t have the funds, the most important thing for anyone is to feel unconditionally loved. From my personal experience, it can be helpful to hear that you don’t blame him for her death, that you love him and know he did everything he could in each moment he had. | |
It is easy to look back and say, “I should’ve done more...” or “I could’ve done this and that would’ve made the difference...” but looking at the past is so easy to judge and think differently. I believe in each moment in the present, we are doing the best we can with the tools and information we have. | |
Again, a counselor could guide you on what to say specifically and the proper timing to best work with your dad to encourage helpful and healing conversations. | |
What would be your ideas to help with grief that came after a breakdown in the relationship? I completely relate to your founding story, in regards to not being able to find the tools in facilitating healing. We had a stillborn death 3 months after discovering my wife had an affair the year previous. We have had a very different journey to healing, and whilst communication has been there, it hasn't always been led in to effective action to meet our needs. More specifically, I've found it difficult to be there as her support and I've wanted to grieve more privately. This has been exacerbated by the pandemic and breakdown in trust. | I’m so sorry - the loss of a baby at birth is so much more than the loss of life. And that can be extra hard if the trust with your partner is on the rocks. My husband and I grieved very differently. He wanted the alone time (introvert). I wanted to talk about it (verbal processor and social person). I honestly considered divorce but thankfully I could take a step back and see that it was just our grief going in two different directions and not necessarily our marriage. We didn’t have any trust issues but we weren’t the best at our communication. We struggled so hard for a couple of years and it was rough, but we fought through it. |
I had a friend lose two sons and her and her husband ended up getting divorced. They had some trust issues and that is the route they chose to move forward with. | |
Your situation is unique to the two of you and your willingness to fight together (be on the same team) or fight against each other. There are so many complex layers to relationships - family influence, past trauma, unresolved hurts within the existing relationship, grief, etc. I honestly think counseling is one of the best ways forward. | |
Our counselor sat us down and asked us what our vision for our marriage was... where did we see ourselves in 10 years. Honestly, I was exhausted and rather hopeless at that point. I didn’t have much to say, but my husband jumped in. He painted this really beautiful vision for our marriage that had me in tears. I had no idea that was what he was hoping for in the future and I was all for it. | |
Having that common vision helped me through the tough times. When I wanted to scream and give up, I held onto that vision and reminded myself that’s what we are both working towards. We are Team Jones and we’re going to make it. | |
Funny thing is I brought up the vision to my husband a year later and he forgot what he said, haha. But it didn’t matter because I knew what he said was true of his heart and it got me through the times I needed it to. | |
I know that doesn’t directly answer your question outside of getting a counselor, but I hope that helps! | |
Hi and thank you for this. Most people’s concept of grief is based on media, and how “you’ll get over it and move on.” Or “cmon- it’s been a year. It’s time to move on” Something I’ve learned after losing my father at age 17 (almost 20 years ago) is that the concept of loss, and grief, is forever. You’ll always miss that person. You’ll always have a hole in your heart for them. An absolutely amazing tool in my healing was an HBO documentary called “Dead Mothers Club”. It’s about all these powerful women in media and Hollywood and how they all lost their mothers at a young age. I learned that if someone like Jane Fonda can live her life with every resource and surround herself with the best people, and she still grieves and mourns 60 years later... maybe that’s normal. Maybe I shouldn’t be ashamed of my grief. As for a question, how do you feel we can normalize mourning and grief in our culture, and not have it be something to hide away or feel ashamed of? | Thanks for sharing your story. I think the more we can make it public, the better - like the documentary you watched. When people realize loss is something everyone goes through, isn’t something to be ashamed of, and grief is to be expected when experiencing loss, it can “normalize” it on a societal level and create more openness and vulnerability in sharing on a personal level. |
Honestly, it’s a big reason I do AMAs. I did one several years ago on this sub reddit and did one on the smaller AMA two weeks ago. It’s also a big motivation on applying to speak at TEDx. I try to book as many speaking gigs, podcast interviews, magazine features as my schedule will allow so that we can open up more conversations and invite as many people to join in as possible. The media plays a critical role and I hope more and more outlets and publications will help break the stigma around grief and loss. The more we talk about it and hear other people’s stories, the less scary it will be. | |
If anyone reading this has connections, please help us open up more conversations! | |
Thank you for doing this AMA and for sharing your experiences with people, it means a lot as I know I struggle to do so. I lost my grandfather to a severe infection last year after a 4-year battle with dementia and I have found myself more relieved than anything else, especially since his cognitive ability was declining rapidly and the isolation and worry of Covid-19 would have been a horrible thing for him to live through. I did find myself wishing that his suffering would be short-lived in the run up to his death, so I feel like I almost wanted him dead as he was inconvenient and got my wish. He was more like a father to me (I called him dad) and he was my oldest friend, so these memories cause me to feel very guilty. I know the relief is normal, along with the guilt and the irrational application of feelings, but it is hard to deal with. Do you think the guilt will ever go away? | Thank you for sharing. Your desires for a short suffering are “normal” as is the relief. I felt the same for my daughter watching her body fail her and felt relief that she died quickly. That doesn’t mean we actually want them gone and I think that can be easily mixed up in our heads. Clearly you loved him and wouldn’t wish him gone for no reason. It was your love that wanted his suffering to end and that’s nothing to feel guilty or shame about. It’s important to remind yourself that and shut the lies up in your head. |
Not all voices in our heads (or in the world for that matter) are good to listen to. We have to be selective because what we listen to shapes our beliefs. You’re not a bad person. You loved your grandpa and he loves you back, even now. | |
I know your guilt can go away and hope you can release it, even if a counselor needs to help you. Sending you so much love this holiday season ♥️ | |
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Thanks for replying Ashley, your kind words and understanding mean a lot. I am seeing a counsellor but it is sometimes easier to write things down than say them - I think I'll bring this up with her at my next session. Sending my love your way this holiday season too. | You’re welcome ♥️ and thank you! |
I have lost loved ones suddenly and I found the thing that heals this loss is time. As time passes the sadness lessens and the joy of cherished memories takes it's place. You can't speed this up or mask it with something. Don't you think the passage of time is the best way to heal? | I think time + intention + presence = healing Time allows us the space to heal, but if we are avoiding the pain and checking out every day, the healing won’t just happen. It takes intention and a willingness to be present in all of the emotions to listen, feel, grieve, and heal. |
That’s my own personal belief. | |
Why do you intend to get this culture of compassion past the institutional treason of capitalism? I’m all for anything that would work on a collective organizational level. | The why is because people are suffering at work and I believe we can do something about it. I was serving a family - the mom was caring for the dad who was on hospice, and they had twin girls. She told me she was let go and didn’t know how she would pay the mortgage as she was the bread winner. Her job also carried the health insurance. Her husband died weeks later. |
That was it for me. I wanted to stand in front of every leader and tell them what it’s like to be a full time employee while also being a full time caregiver and the sole provider for a family. I wanted to take her story and show how heartless her bosses were as the example of what not to do. | |
I also would hear from different executives that they wanted to help employees who had lost loved ones or even team members who had died but didn’t know what to do. | |
So we are here to help. | |
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Well Satan bless you, I hope you succeed beyond your wildest dreams. But this just sounds like yet another individualistic response to a systemic problem. Abolishing capitalism is how you fix this, not convincing corporations to be more compassionate. It’s kind of like trying to convince individual nazis that they’re bad. You can only get so far. Good luck! | I appreciate the comment and respectfully disagree. We are going to be working with executives to change the culture and support leadership in making those changes, which will impact everyone in the company to some degree and have ripple effects into future generations. |
I may not fully understand the beast of capitalism, but I do understand healing and the power of love. | |
I’ve met several corporations that have incredible leaders and cultures already that show me it’s possible for both to exist. Tillamook is one of the companies that are leading the way with empathy and a culture of caring. | |
Do you have any suggestions on dealing with the sadness that comes along with memories of lost loved ones? My mom passed away on my 22nd birthday 2 years ago. She was the only close family I had. Now it's hard to celebrate my birthday without that grief creeping up. Her birthday was on Christmas Eve too, which also make the holidays tough. I loved my mom endlessly, and still do. But I'm 24 and I don't want to spend all these moments that should be filled with joy crying. Are there also any affordable services that deal with grief that you could recommend? I'm a college student with very unstable finances. I have yet to talk to a professional about what has happened, but would very much like to. | First, I am so sorry. Having those dates fall on celebratory occasions can be extra challenging. Have you looked into what your school provides? Some colleges have programs or counseling offerings that are free for students. I would definitely start there. I’m glad you’re open to talking to a professional and hope you find someone who you work well with as you process everything. |
There are also free mindfulness and meditation practices that you could cultivate (a simple google search on grief meditations will pull up a bunch - they’re not all good, but you can sort through them). I’m not sure if you’re a reader or like to listen to podcasts, but that’s an option too. Check out our library page that has some podcasts listed as well as some books if that’s your thing as a place to start. | |
I would also encourage you to think of ways to flip the script. Instead of thinking of it as a day to be miserable and sad, is there a way you could honor your mom instead? For example, if she loved flowers, you could plant a flowering plant somewhere every year to remember her and spread joy to everyone who sees it. Did she do anything for you on birthdays past that you would want to repeat in her memory? What would you gift her on her birthday and could you find a single person in a nursing home or someone living by themselves to give something to in honor of her? | |
For my daughter’s birthday, I was miserable for the first 4 years after she died. I literally spent the first birthday without her in her empty bed eating brownies - it was bad. Each year was different -some worse than others. But on what would’ve been her 6th birthday, I launched Love Not Lost. I invited 30 of our closest friends and family members to share my vision with and asked them to help me raise $6,000 in honor of her 6th birthday. Everyone came together to help me meet the goal and we launched our website and promo video as a result. | |
I hope that helps. My heart is with you! | |
Any tips on recovering from suicide grief? I’ve lost loved ones naturally before, but my beloved cousin’s suicide was over 3 years ago, and I’m still stuck in my grief with no end in sight. This grief is so utterly different than grief I had experienced prior, and I just can’t find my “acceptance”. | I think my questions would be - how is it different for you? What has you stuck? Why is that? I made a comment earlier today about the 5 stages of grief and how they shouldn’t be applied to grief in general. Please don’t hold yourself to the 5 stages because they are specifically designed for people facing their own death. Grief in losing a loved one is complex, messy, and it doesn’t end. It doesn’t always have to be painful, but just as your love for someone doesn’t go away, your grief won’t either. |
after having a lengthy conversation with a friend about how most non profit organizations do actually make money (paying board of directors and people like you) can you give some insight on this? After really just discovering this I feel a little weird considering how much money some nonprofits make. But all in all, every single one does help people so I dont have a major issue other than the misleading direction that the name Non profit has become associated with. Thank you so much for what you do! | Yes - so there is a huge misconception that nonprofits should operate on zero costs, which some have the capability to do that with volunteers and connections. However, most nonprofits are set up to operate like a business - but instead of “profits” going to shareholders and individuals, it is held by the nonprofit and invested in future projects, staff, etc. We actually don’t pay our board members a penny. They are a volunteer board and actually give money to Love Not Lost to help us grow. We have two full times staff members (myself being one of them) and desperately need more to reach the capacity we want to hit, but we’re working on fundraising for that in 2021. |
Just like any industry, there are good ones and there are bad ones. The lack of transparency in the nonprofit industry of the history of its existence has been a huge disappointment. Love Not Lost is 5 years old and we’ve talked with so many people who have trust issues with nonprofits in general and we get it. We’ve worked hard to earn trust from our community and show our impact and stewardship. | |
Education is so important and we’re grateful for people like Dan Pallotta - check out his TED talk here.. He’s written books and facilitated workshops that are pretty fantastic to encourage more entrepreneurial thinking and have more efficiency in operations. You might find his stuff interesting. | |
Thanks for the question and for joining the conversation. Happy holidays! | |
Do you have any tips on how to function with anticipatory grief? My Mom was very unexpectedly diagnosed with stage iv cancer about a month ago. While I will not give up hope that she can overcome or live a long time with this disease, I still feel like I am in the midst of grief. I am grieving the loss of her role in my life, grieving her health, and grieving the ideas I had for my future with her. | Hey - just curious, would you be willing to share what state you’re in? Functioning with anticipatory grief is definitely a challenge, and if you’re able, I would highly recommend a counselor that you can confide in throughout the journey. They’ll be able to guide you through the day to day challenges that will arise and support you through specific stressors that are hard to give general advice for... |
From my own personal experience with my daughter’s illness and death, it’s hard. My heart is with you on this one. It was such a struggle not to let fear of death and the future rob me of the joy and life in the present. It helped me to set intentions to choose love each day, to breathe into the present moment every time I got anxious, and remind myself of all of the things I still had. | |
Writing really helped me. I kept a weekly blog - sometimes daily - throughout my journey on blogspot (lol, that sounds so dated - it was 10 years ago). Grief broke me wide open and allowed me to expand so much as an individual. | |
I hope you can find what helps you. It’s a tough road ahead, but one that is so rich too. | |
My fiance lost his brother suddenly 2 months ago. They didn’t have a great relationship however were mending fences and trying to reconnect. Unfortunately the brother’s time ran out due to an overdose. The sudden death and loss has left him with not only guilt, questions, and sadness but also crippling anxiety. He never had anxiety before but now he gets triggered randomly and finds himself unable to breath, think rationally, and function almost daily. Do you have any insight on why he suddenly suffers from anxiety attacks? Or perhaps what I can do as his partner? Also, we planned on getting married in July however I’m worried it may be too soon. He insists he’ll be fine by then but I’m scared wedding stress might make him have an anxiety attack on the day of. I keep telling him we should postpone another year but he doesn’t agree. I desperately want to give him all the time he needs to grieve and allow the anxiety to go away however he seems to be opposed. | I am so sorry - is he open to going to counseling? Or does he already have a good therapist? Have you seen a therapist together? It sounds like there are a lot of layers there. I’m not sure I can be extremely helpful, but I know a good therapist would be able to dive into this with you and help him with his anxiety and possibly help guide you as a couple (and help him think rationally about his anxiety, wedding pressures, etc.). Is that something you can afford or would consider? |
the below is a reply to the above | |
Thanks for replying! He will begin receiving medical insurance from his job in January so he plans on seeking help then when it is covered. We were in Mexico earlier this week and he went to see a therapist since it’s cheap out there. It was only one session however he shared with me that he found it helpful. Apparently the therapist dived into why he’s feeling anxiety and together they identified alcohol as a trigger. For context, the day before we had visited a vineyard and did a tasting. Later that night he got anxiety while walking around the beach. Anyways Since the session my fiancé has decided to stop drinking for some time to see if it helps stop the anxiety. | That’s awesome. I hope the anxiety solution is as simple as stop drinking. I am pretty sensitive to caffeine and don’t drink coffee or soda often because it can cause increased anxiety for me. |
If he’s open to it, I think a couples counselor would be incredibly helpful if you can find a good one. You have so many big life changes/decisions coming up and it can be hard to navigate those even in the best of circumstances. Regardless, I am rooting for you and hope you are able to communicate safely with one another and build trust through the process. | |
how would this work for losing an early term pregnancy? You don't get pictures of the baby. Not to mention society as a whole does not recognize or acknowledge that type of loss | I agree that society doesn’t do a good job in recognizing early pregnancy loss, and I hope that’s changing as more people (celebrities included) are sharing their miscarriage stories. We will continue working to normalize loss and grief of all kinds so that support is always available to those who need it. |
Our goal at Love Not Lost with our portrait sessions is to celebrate life and preserve memories of love. If there is enough time with an early term pregnancy loss, we would offer a maternity session. We’ve done this for several families - middle to late term - who knew they were going to lose their baby. | |
We had a mom share that the photos bring her so much joy now because she was able to feel the baby move during the session and those photos bring her back to those moments. We’ve had another mom share the photos validated her as a mother as she sat in an empty nursery on Mother’s Day. | |
I hope that answers your question about how it works - I made the assumption you were talking about the photo sessions since you mentioned pictures. Feel free to ask a follow up if I missed anything! | |
the below is a reply to the above | |
well that would not help me as my losses were at 5 and 8 weeks out of nowhere and I was of course not showing yet. You might want to think about a way to do something for those people like me. Some of those women don't even have an ultrasound pic at that point. You seemed to think having a picture helped but I was pointing out a situation of grief and loss where they are no pictures. So what the heck would someone like me do? | Do you have any suggestions? We would totally be open to hearing ideas! |
the below is a reply to the above | |
No, not really. But that grief is just as real and serious and they often go completely ignored. I know I was. | I completely agree with you and am sorry that was your experience. If anything comes to you, reach out any time. |
I’m a high school teacher whose students must work from home. How can I help them deal with this stress? | I hope other teachers comment on things they’ve done or ideas they’ve seen others use... I can share some ideas, but again, I would love to hear from other teachers on this! |
I have several teacher friends and one thing that has made a tremendous impact in one of the classes is the teacher starts every day with a check in. Every student gets to speak and share how they are doing. Sometimes it’s a “one a scale of 1-10, how are you feeling today” with short answers and other days it’s a longer prompt that encourages students to share more. | |
I think it’s really powerful when a teacher can create a safe space (making rules and culture standards if needed) for students to share their feelings and allow them to feel seen and heard. | |
How easy is it to lecture on a Tedx talk? I’ve seen some real stinkers and have heard that there is very little vetting process taking place. | Each TEDx is independently operated so I believe that each one is unique and different based on the organizers and volunteers. |
With that said, I was under the impression that more would be offered by TED as a whole and they are pretty much removed from it. |
"WoTonPrime will no longer do #WoTWednesday and instead will give updates photos and more on any day of the week as new info comes out using #wotonprime".Coming just as Block 1 filming began to wrap, this announcement likely signaled an upcoming change in Amazon's marketing strategy gearing up toward a release in late 2020. January and February 2020 gave us two new set photos as well as three table read photos introducing five new actors (but not their roles). Then something happened...
Q: How are you planning to handle the visualization of the weaves? Any little tidbits?Amazon's studio boss Jennifer Salke said, "the material coming out of production looks incredible".
A: We are trying to stay as true to the books as possible. I’ve been giving a bunch of VFX folks long diatribes about channeling, weaves, threads, earth vs. air, etc and they early stuff has started coming in. It looks FUCKING AWESOME. I screamed when Rosamund started channeling
DEFINITIONS AS OF 22 JAN 2021 | Definitions |
---|---|
1 man ballast party | Extremely fat shipmate |
24WWGHE | “24 weeks wasted. Go home, Ensign!” |
45/45 | 45 days restriction, 45 days busted down in rank |
6 and 6 | Full workday = working from midnight to 6 pm |
72 | 3 day weekend |
96 | 4 day weekend |
99 | Everyone; see ALCON |
ACK | Acknowledge; typically used in chat |
A-gang | Auxiliary division of Engineering department |
Airframer | Someone who works on or with the planes/helos |
ALCON | All concerned |
All conditions normal | A report made from a watch stander declaring there’s nothing wrong, or at least you’ll just have to take their word for it |
All elbows and assholes | Everyone |
A lot of moving parts | There’s a lot of stuff happening at the same time (implication is to not fuck it up) |
Angle-irons | A construction material consisting of pieces of steel with an L-shaped cross-section, able to be bolted together. |
As Fragged | As planned |
Ass hat | An idiot |
ATFQ | Answer the Fucking Question (or Full Question if someone in authority asks |
AUX Tank | Auxiliary tank |
Bagged nasty | Disgusting bags lunches |
Bag the watch | Relieve some late or screw them somehow. |
BallGazer | The taunting moniker given to one who has recently gazed upon balls, usually when the owner of the balls displays his thumb and index finger forming a circle over the balls. |
Balls | Midnight (0000 looks like balls) |
Balls to X watch | Midnight to x watch |
Battle Buddy | Person you stay with; often appointed or mandated |
Battle rhythm | Daily routine |
Beat a dead horse | Drive the point home |
Beef Stroke-me-off | Beef stroganoff |
Been in since breakfast | /newtothenavy |
Behoove | It is in your best interest of not getting yelled at |
Belay my last | Said over the net, especially 1MC when you fuck up an announcement |
Belt-fed cock: | A shitty situation that just keeps going |
Beno-be | Need definition |
Bent shit can | As a replacement for someone incapable |
Binder warfare | Coming to the realization that your main job in the navy is building and maintaining binders and admin; see CYA |
Birds | Aircraft, usually helicopters |
Blue falcon | Buddy fucker / throwing someone under the bus |
Blue nose | Sailor that has crossed the Arctic Circle and participated in ceremony |
BLUF | Basic line up front; usually at the top of emails, often is not basic |
Boat Boo | A sailor’s girlfriend or boyfriend aboard ship, usually during deployment, and often an arranged affair between two married sailors. |
Boat chucks | Need definition |
Boat hot/ Ship 9/ Deployment 8, etc | Rating attractiveness with a caveat |
Boats | A term usually given to the senior Boatswain Mate on ship |
BOHICA | Bend Over, Here It Comes Again |
Boondockers | A boot you wear on ship |
Boot/Booters | New to the Navy |
Boots on the ground | People out there doing things |
Bremerlo | A certain female dwelling in vicinity of Bremerton; see Grotopotmous |
Brick | Old fashioned communications device |
Broom Closet | Where you store all the cleaning supplies, usually small. |
Brownies | Brown short shorts |
Bubblehead | Submariner |
Bug Juice | Sugary kool-aid type drink served in mess |
Bull | Senior Ensign in Wardroom |
Bunkie Monkey | Need definition |
Burn a flick | Watch a movie |
Burning holes in the sky | Wasting gas flying around |
Bust me on the surface | “Sir, i am disregarding your stupid orders for crew/my safety and when we survive despite your efforts you can take me to mast.” |
Butter bar | Ensign |
Butt shark | Brown noser, suck-up |
Cage | Keep under wraps, or decrease visibility of something; “We have to cage expectations” |
Can’t swing a dead cat without hitting x | There is a lot of something and it’s pretty easy to find |
Capture it in a slide | Stop talking or writing and put it in a powerpoint slide so we can "understand" it or at least make it look like we are doing something. |
Checks with charted water | Need definition |
Check valve | A shipmate who makes a food or drink run and doesn't ask anyone else if they want anything. This is especially true if they're getting a delivery order and it would have been easy to just order more food. Fucking check valve. |
Cheese dicking | In a sentence: “If you’re cheese dicking it stop, get help from someone who knows" |
Chicken wheels | Chicken-like substance served on mess deck |
Chief of the Broach | Chief of the watch controls ballast and trim when at sea, a poor or inexperienced one will cause us to Broach when approaching the surface for comms or something, so he is known as Chief of the Broach. |
Chit | A form usually submitted up through the chain of command allowing you to do something |
Chocks out | Ready to go; see pull/pulling chocks |
Cinderella Liberty | Liberty expires as midnight |
CIP / cip | Come in please |
Civvies | Civilian clothes |
Clamp down | Tighten or get ahold of typically an out of hand situation |
Cleaning party | Group put together to clean something |
Clear as mud? | “Is it clear?” Usually said after confusing explanation but implying that there should not be any more questions and that you should just shut up and go do what you’re told |
Clear your Baffles | Also Sweep your baffles: Term used to describe the turning of the sub to allow sonar to look at the area behind boat that would be shielded by the sub itself. We would normally give nubs on the boat a broom and ask them to sweep the baffles. |
COB | Chief of the Boat, aka CMC |
COBRA | Chief of the Boat, Reactor Aft. Senior enlisted Nuke on a sub, aka EDMC |
Cock and cake | “They’re serving cock and cake on the mess decks and are fresh out of cake” |
Cock holster | Mouth |
Code Brown | Need definition |
Coner | (Submarine Service) A submarine crewman who is not part of the engineering department (slang for Nuke below), especially Torpedomen |
Cover down | Fill in; we need someone to cover down since SN Timmy has COVID |
Cowlings | The removable cover of a vehicle or aircraft engine. |
Crayon eaters | Marines |
Crocodile closest to the canoe | The most relevant near-term problem related to a situation |
Crutch gear | Need definition |
Cupcaking | To flirt with or get together with someone else at the command |
CYA | Cover your ass |
Dan | Dinq Ass Nub. Someone who is not qualified. Dept. Skittle is a disparaging term for anyone who wears a flight deck jersey. |
Death Pillows | Ravioli |
Deckplate leadership | Talking to sailors, making oneself be seen; typically Chiefs brag about it |
Deep Six | Get rid of something |
Dependa | A dependent, typically implying a lazy, overweight spouse who does not work |
Dick broom | Mustache |
Dick skinners | Hands |
Diggit | As in that diggit is at it again, doing preemptive maintenance. Or a diggit tool being a multi tool. |
DINQ | (Pronounced "Dink") Acronym for Delinquent In Qualifications. Ex: "That shitbird is dinq on ship's quals!" |
Dirtbag | A lazy and almost useless sailor. Produces substandard work-usually creating extra work for his shipmates. Accompanied by a bad attitude and desire to leave service ASAP. |
Divers working aloft | Something ridiculous happening |
Divisional / Wardroom gentleman | At the end of someone’s tour when they start shedding duties like a snake shedding its skin and begins to no longer have a job at the command |
Dog and pony show | All of the ridiculous things a command usually does to impress a visiting dignitary or put on some ceremony |
Doghouse | In trouble |
Donkey Dick | Term used for many nozzle shaped implements |
Don’t give up the ship | Phrase said by John Paul Jones, to not give up the ship |
DOTM | Destroyer of all things mechanical |
Double down | Work harder at a task; usually implying there is a time crunch |
Double headed dragon | Whenever you get so fucked up you throw up on your dick while your taking a shit |
Drinking out of a fire hose | Lots of information presented, usually via PowerPoint by unenthusiastic school |
Drive-by | Un-announced check in from leadership; usually with negative or frustrating timing and/or consequences. |
Drop your cocks and grab your socks | Get ready to do something |
Dunnage | Anything used in the shipping industry to brace and protect the freight being transported. Dunnage includes, but is not limited to, empty cardboard boxes, inflated shipping pillows, lengths of wood, pallets, styrofoam, bubble wrap, etc. |
Duty Head Roll the Dice | Returning from liberty in a foreign port) |
Easy day | Some task will be simple to carry out |
ECF | Error Carried Forward |
Every swinging dick | Every person |
Fan room counseling | Counseling in a hidden place, implying that there was some physical aspect to rectify a sailor who has been bad |
FCF | Need definition |
FIGMO | Fuck it, got my orders |
Fish | Submarine warfare insignia / Also a torpedo |
Fishbowling | To put alcohol into a fishbowl, color it with food coloring, and drink it with bendy straws |
FOD God | Foreign object damage god |
Food for freedom | Getting kicked out for being out of body standards |
Food run | Go off the ship or command to grab food for yourself or a group, sometimes the duty section |
Force Multiplier | Be the person that |
Four Meal Fatty | fr when we did 18 hr days) |
Fried fish shoes | Need definition |
Fru-fru coffee | Nice coffee; some of that gourmet shit |
FUBAR | Fucked up beyond all recognition |
FUBIJAR | Fuck U buddy I’m just a reservist. |
Fuck | A word that can be used as a noun, verb, adjective, adverb, and pronoun, often simultaneously. Indeed it can be its own sentence to a properly motivated sailor. |
Fucked up as a football bat | You don’t use a bat for football, so that means something or someone is fucked up AND useless |
Fuck fuck games | Stupid games that are not contributing to getting the job done so you can go home |
Fucktard | An idiot |
Full speed ahead | Did something without thinking; throwing caution to the wind |
FYSA | For your situational awareness |
GA | Go ahead ; used in short hand in chat |
Gaggle/gigglefuck | Unformed group going from place to place Struggle Snuggle-sleeping where you can between endless drill sets, usually in a pile. |
Galley | Cafeteria |
Gear adrift | Loose or unsecured gear or equipment. Also a less-than-flattering assessment of a sailor "Seaman Jones is gear adrift!" |
Geedunk | Candy, snacks, or a place that sells either |
Get Hot | To do hard work or exercise. |
Get your knee pads ready | You messed up or did something stupid, prepare to have to do ridiculous things to get out the bind you are in. |
Goat locker | Lounge or galley for the exclusive use of Chiefs |
Goat Locker Working Party | A group working that's not actually achieving anything |
Go Fasters | Tennis or running shoes meant for working out |
Go get me a BT punch | Need definition |
Going sad | Claiming or actually having depression or suicidal ideation and thereby leaving duty station |
Gonna be a bad day | If you do something stupid “It’s gonna be a bad day for everyone.” |
Good deal | Falling down those stairs will hurt but you might break your leg and skip a deployment, that's a good deal |
Good idea fairy | Those wonderful folks filled with ideas, creating work for the rest of us |
Good to go | Ready |
Go to GQ | Go to general quarters; all hands on deck |
Greenies | Little green shorts |
Greenside | Marine corps |
Grey space | Period of time between evolutions where nothing is planned |
Gronk it Down | Need definition |
Grotopotamus | The rather large ladies that graze around the Groton, CT area. Similar to a Bremerloe |
Guacaflauge | Term fo the current Green Type III Camouflage uniforms |
Gundeck /Gundecking | To fudge maintenance or qualifications |
Hamster | Chicken Cordon Bleu - A baked breaded piece of chicken with ham and cheese in the middle |
Hardpack | The coveted ice cream that is scooped out of its container, I.e. not soft serve |
Hatch | Door on ship |
Haze gray and underway | Navy ship going out to sea |
Head | Restroom |
Heave out and trice up | Wake up |
Helmet fire | When a pilot becomes so task saturated in the cockpit that he loses the big picture and situational awareness (SA). Often leads to mistakes that can produce lethal results. |
Hhotter than two squirrels fuckin in a wool sock! | It is very hot outside |
High and to the right | Over-react |
High Speed | High performing |
High speed low drag | High performing and efficient |
Hinge | O-4 / LCDR |
Hip pocket class | Need definition |
Hit the deckplates | Walking around and getting to know sailors; preached by chiefs mess |
Hollywood shower | Long shower |
Hookin and jabbin | Fighting |
HOOYAH | Navy’s take on Oorah / Hoo-ah; |
Horizontal time machine | Bed / rack |
Hot-ass - (noun for anything and everything) | Some (noun) is great |
Hot racking | Multiple people sharing |
Hot Runner | When you're two weeks ahead on your quals |
However comma | A phrase said by uncreative leaders attempting to emphasize a point while addressing a crowd of disinterested sailors |
Hurry up and wait | A cross-service saying poking fun at the fact that we are always rushing to then commence a long period of waiting before beginning any evolution |
Hydro that blouse | when that shirt button is holding on for dear life to stay on due to wearers weight |
IAW | In accordance with |
IBM | Instant Bosun Mate |
If you’re not early, you’re late | Be early, because we start on time and are not going to wait |
I had it you got it | Said during rushed watch turnover wher |
It gets better after ORSE | There is always another ORSE (Operational Reactor Safeguard Examination) coming, hence it never gets better. |
IYAOYAS | If you ain't ordnance, you ain't shit |
Jam Dive Buddy | That special friend you designate as "emotional" support when your submarine is headed the way of the Thresher. Also just an acronym for shorthand. |
J-dial | Internal communication system identifier on ships |
Jesus Nut | Slang term for the main rotor retaining nut or mast nut, which holds the main rotor to the mast of some helicopters. The related slang term Jesus pin refers to the lock pin used to secure the retaining nut. |
Joe / Joe Navy | A highly motivated member of the service who has “drank the kool aid” |
Joe Schmuckatelli | a reference to any person from Chief |
Joker | Idiot, someone who doesn’t take things seriously |
JORG | Junior officer requiring guidance: Ensign designated by wardroom as the bottom of the ensigns. JORG is in charge of events and wardroom shenanigans and carrying on “tradition” |
Keelhaul | A punishment inflicted for various offences in the Dutch Navy. It is performed by plunging the delinquent repeatedly under the ship's bottom on one side, and hoisting him up on the other, after having passed under the keel. Not currently in practice, hopefully. |
Keep steady strain | Keep up the hard work |
Keep the plates spinning | Keep juggling a lot of different projects and things that are going on |
Khaki | Term used to describe senior enlisted members (E-7 and above) or officers, due to the khaki-colored working uniform typically worn by them. |
Khaki Fucker | Someone who sucks up to khaki leadership |
Knee-knockers | A knee-knocker refers to the bottom portion of a watertight door’s frame. They are notorious for causing shin injuries. The drunken sailor’s worst enemy. |
Knife hands | A term to describe a flattened hand pointed at someone, either done seriously or ironically |
Knock the high dust off | Pay special attention to something, dig deep |
Knock the rust off | Get back to doing something after not doing it for a while |
Knuckle-dragger | Mechanic |
LDI | Liberty dependant item |
Leaders | Typically addressed to a group of sailors or khaki in an email; see 99 or ALCON. |
Level cake | When the cooks make a sheet cake that's 1/2" thick on one side and 4" on the other, and try to level it out with frosting Hollywood shower: shower that lasts longer than necessary, usually not done by the people that desperately need them |
Liberty call, Liberty call | The most sweet words you’ll ever hear after pulling into port; If you aren’t on duty, you can leave the ship |
Like a monkey fuckin a coconut! | Someone is messing something up |
Line | Flight Line |
Line Rats | Sailors who get around the flight line |
Living document | A document that is in draft and is expected to continue requiring updates |
Living the dream | A phrase said when asked how you are doing. Response following usually is: “Nightmares are dreams too” then everyone reflects on how deeply they are indoctrinated |
Long pole in the tent | The person doing all the work for everyone; also implying that you are not sharing the workload well enough |
Maintenance Bible | COMNAVAIRFORINST 4790.2 |
Maintenance by the book, with the book open | Don’t fuck up this maintenance |
Make a hole | Move out of the way |
Making sausage | The arduous small steps in a larger process to actually accomplish a bigger project |
Manned up/manned and ready | Everyone is ready at where they are supposed to be to begin some evolution |
MARF | Make A Rove, Fucktard. What the duty chief tells the rover when he comes up for tour or smoke and the rover "just" came back from a rove and is hanging out in the pood shack every damn time |
Marking turns for nowhere | Not pulling into port anytime |
Max blast | Full capacity |
Mech | A mechanic |
Mechanical agitation | Smack the shit out of something with a hammer, mallet, or wrench until you get it loose, free, or make it work. You can't say, "Oh yeah, I just walloped it with a big-ass hammer." But you can say, "Liberally applied mechanical agitation to free the stuck valve." See percussive maintenance. |
Melting kids to the sidewalk | Blowing stuff up / dropping bombs; see warheads on foreheads |
Mid-Rats | Food served out at sea at midnight for the off-going watch team |
Milk truck | Someone who made/makes a bunch of noise on a submarine, threatening stealth |
Missing gear | Missing something, may have been stolen |
MITRN | Maybe in the Russian Navy |
Monkey's Paw/fist | A type of knot, so named because it looks somewhat like a small bunched fist/paw. |
Monkey dick | An idiot or dumbass |
Monkey Shit | Thick, white packing material used in a feeble attempt to seal openings between bulkheads where cables run through. |
MOTO | Master of the Obvious, Moto could also be short for motivated |
ABA | Answer by accident |
Muscle fucked | Need definition (FOR the record, I searched this one on google. I don’t think the videos that came up were what this phrase is referring to… |
NAMP | Naval Aviation Maintenance Program |
Nastygram | A email sent from your higher headquarters or other command telling you that you messed up |
NAVY | Never again volunteer yourself = lessons for life |
Navy Gravy | Navy coffee |
Next time check the pub instead of your rectal database, shipmate! | Someone gave you bad gouge |
Night ops | Operations at night; doing something in a clandestine way |
NNMBM | Navy Needs More Bosun's Mates (ie, you're a fucking idiot) |
No liberty | Can’t go out in town |
NonQual | Also known as a Dinq Ass bitch |
Nooner | A nap taken during lunch |
NUB | Non Useful Body |
Nug it out | Spend the time to do something that is time consuming |
Nuke it | To overthink an easy task |
Nut to butt | Get a close as possible; usually in marching formation |
OBNOB | Only black nuke onboard |
Offline / talk offline | Said during meetings to have a separate discussion outside the current situation. Said by either those who do not want their idiocy observed by others, OR they are considerate enough to not subject everyone else to the pointless conversation |
Old dirt | Unique and different from “new dirt” |
Once over dust, twice over rust | Said when painting; implying that sometimes its best to just paint over stuff |
One is NONE | You can’t do something alone |
Out-fucking-standing | Great, but usually said with heavy sarcasm |
Outlook leadership | Leading from the front, utilizing the finest Microsoft Office tech |
Outside your Swim lane / wheelhouse | An area that is not in your job description; “this task is outside your swimlane, BMC” |
Oxygen Thief | An idiot, literally stealing oxygen |
Paper chiefs/ensigns/assholes | Gummed Reinforcements (office supplies) |
Part-time sailor | SSBN sailors |
Peanut butter shot | A painful shot normally given in the back of the hip or gluteus maximus. |
Pecker Checker | Corpsman |
Percussive maintenance | Conduct maintenance by hitting something |
PERGA | PERGA / Permission Granted |
Phantom shitter | An unidentified fugitive who shits in places they should not |
Phone Bitch | Someone whose sole job it is to carry or talk on the phone |
Piggyback | To add to what someone else said. “To piggyback off of what the Captain said….” |
Playing switchem with donuts | See Switchem: Where one would stack donuts on the soiled thumb to chew on. |
Play stupid games win stupid prizes | You get hurt or get in trouble doing something that was dumb and people told you not to do |
Point of Fuck UpPOFU | "Sir, as depicted in this image is the battle groups POFU." |
Pollywog / Wog | Someone who has not yet participated in a “Crossing of the line” ceremony |
Poopy Suit | Coveralls |
Pop smoke | Make people aware of a bad situation / call for help |
Port and starboard watch bill | 6 hours on 6 hours off work indefinitely |
Pot of money | Where something is funded from |
Problem with a capital P | Big problem |
Promulgate | Put out information |
Provide bodies | Offer up a group of sailors who work for you to do a task |
Pubs | As in publications |
Pukes | Any group you have to deal with who isn't crew. i.e. Squadron pukes. |
Pulling chocks | Get ready to leave or leave |
PUMA | Possibly the ugliest man aboard |
Push these racks outboard | Boot camp reference prior to exercising the living crap out of your group |
Putting out fires | The act of taking care of problems |
Rack back | Go to bed |
Rack city | Beds / go to bed |
Rack out | Go to sleep |
Rack to the future | Go to bed to pass the time |
Rattles like two skeletons fucking in a garbage can | Something is loud |
Read means dead | If you see red, that is bad |
Redline | You cannot cross this line, or you are prohibited from doing something |
Refreshment Technician | Engine room watchstander. Sometimes called reactor technician |
Rhinos | Jets |
Riders / Fucking Riders | People who are TAD to a ship or aircraft and do absolutely nothing useful except take up space and get in line first |
Ring knocker | One of our illustrious Academy Graduates |
Roach Coach | The snack or lunch truck that stops by the pier. |
ROAD Program | Retired on Active Duty |
Roast beast | Pejorative term for the roast beef served |
Rock fight | “Navy cooks could fuck up a rock fight.” |
Roger up | Provide a response/provide a response that you are going to do something |
Rolling out | Leaving |
RTFM | Read the Fucking/Full Manual |
Sailor-proof or Sailor-proofing | Make something so hard to fuck up that even sailors cant fuck it up |
Same shit, different day | Phrase said by those who have long since lost their sense of self on their way to reaching that 20 year mark |
SAT and UNSAT | Satisfactory and unsatisfactory; terms to des |
Saved rounds | Additional comments; said at the end of a meeting “any saved rounds?” |
Say again | Please repeat what you just said |
Schoolhouse | The place where you go to “learn” skills from powerpoint and a bored instructor |
Scooby snacks | Snacks |
Scuttlebutt | A water fountain on a ship; also means gossip |
Sea and Anchor Detail | The all hands evolution required to get underway and go out to sea (as well as anchor. |
Sea Dad/Daddy/mom/Pup | A mentomentee |
Sea lawyer | Someone who cites, recites and interprets manuals, regulations and rule, usually to their own benefit or to prove someone wrong |
Seaman/Fireman/_man Schmuckatelli /Timmy | A random or average sailor (implication is that they’re new to the navy and kind of an idiot) |
Sea Pussy | A yeoman or personnelman - akin to a secretary - does clerical work |
Sea sniffer | Need definition |
Secure for sea /but ironically and unironically) | Make sure stuff is tied down so that it doesn’t move when the ship is bouncing around at sea |
Semper gumby | Remain flexible |
Send it | Do it |
Send up to the old man | Send something up to the Captain |
Set Yoke on her | To set Yoke |
Shady Shit | Stuff that is probably not legal |
Shaft alley dive team | People who do the work in the bilges |
Shaft to aft | The engineering spaces |
Shellback | The salty sailor who has crossed the line and is no longer a slimy polywog |
Shillelagh Make fast Skivey waver | Signalman |
Shipmate / Shipmaaaaate | A term to describe all fellow sailors: Said both ironically and un-ironically. Ship, shipmate, self! |
Shitbag | AKA Sierra Bravo; Usually not put together shipmate, or one who does stuff that constantly screws over others and doesn’t care about their own actions |
Shitmate | Shipmate + Shit |
Shit on a shingle | Darnit |
Shitrats | Pejorative term for midrats |
Shitshow | Describing something that was messed up |
Shitwhack/Fuckwhack | Same as shitload/fuckload |
Shoot a red star cluster | Let people know you need help |
Shooting from the hip | Guessing |
Short | As in short timer |
Shotgun blast | Send out information or an email to a lot of people unexpectedly |
Sick call commando | Someone who “gets sick” a lot |
Sick call warrior | Same as sick call commando |
Sidebar | A legal term used to describe the need to not subject everyone else to a conversation that is happening that does not concern the wider group |
Silence on the net | Shut up and stop talking on the radios; Also used as “I’m hearing silence on the net” as in no one is responding |
Skate / skater | Someone who’s trying to avoid work |
Skim the wave tops | Only talk about the important points |
Slobbering geek | IT, or anyone trying to be an IT |
Sloppy Hoes | Pejorative name for sloppy joes |
SMAG | Simple minded ass grabber. Superior mechanic, almost Godlike. And another that’s probably not allowed here. Certain type of Nuke (Engineering Lab Tech). |
Smokin and jokin/ coking and joking | Joking around; typically used in reference of a bunch of people who are not working when they should be |
Smoking lamp | Where you can smoke onboard the ship. When the smoking lamp is lit, you are allowed to smoke. |
Smoothie | Nuke ET. Short for smooth crotch. Refers to the lack of any defined features in the “crotchal region” |
SNAFU | Situation Normal All Fucked Up |
SNOB | Shortest (least time left) nuke on board) |
Sound the alarm | Make others aware of a situation |
Soup sandwich | Someone or something that is a complete mess/completely fucked up |
Soup to nuts | Beginning to end |
Spearhead | Initiate, lead |
Standby to standby / Stand the fuck by | Standby because you’re in trouble and whatever leader just said this is so angry they can’t think of a punishment just yet |
Struggle snuggle | Sleeping where you can between endless drillsets, usually in a pile. |
Strut Gear | Landing gear |
Stump the chump | Asking questions that are so specific and ridiculous, you’re not even sure if the person asking them knows; tactic employed by assholes sitting on qualifications boards |
Sucked their way to the top/ EP | Did or is perceived as having done special things to make rank or qualifications / eval |
Sucking Ghost Dick | Vaping |
Suck start a mossberg | Kill oneself |
Sun of a gun | Damnit |
Super Secret squirrel | The weirdos who do anything Information warfare related |
Swabs | Mops |
Sweat equity | The value of hard work |
Sweepers | Daily required cleaning of the ship |
Switchem | When you are sucking one thumb, and the other is up your ass. Then someone yells SWITCHEM and you switch the thumbs |
Tacticool | Term used for someone who is decked out in gear but kind of looks like a dweeb |
Take a round turn | Double check and work harder at something |
TBI | True but irrelevant |
THE Academy | THE United States Naval Academy |
The balls | Any watch that goes through midnight (0000) |
The love shack | Whichever room on the ship that has the most people shacking up caught in it) |
The pit | The engine room |
The rev | The watch in which reveille is called |
The Sandbox | What happens in the sandbox, stays in the sandbox) |
The squeaky wheel gets the grease | The most noticeable (or loudest) problems are the ones most likely to get attention. |
Throat | End/Beginning of the taxiway |
Tie up loose ends | Take care of the little unfinished tasks |
Time in the rack is time off the boat | Sleeping allows you to forget you’re on deployment |
Toilet lasagna | When a toilet doesn’t flush and someone shits in it, then someone lays a layer of TP to not look at it, the some shots on the TP. Repeat. |
Too easy / Easy day | The task ahead will be not difficult |
Tool Bitch | Someone who can't really help you fix something you are working on or anything else for that matter. So to make them feel like they are worth anything at all you allow them to get you the tools you need for the job. |
Topsider | Those fortunate souls who do not work in Engineering |
Tracking | Are you following? Often said by leadership needing while giving speeches to gauge or increase engagement of those poor souls that have to listen to their incessant blabbering |
Triangle fish | Fish served in galley |
Tricare-atops | People who marry servicemembers for the “amazing” healthcare; see Dependa |
Trip to the fanroom | Take care of something by physical means |
Trust yet verify | Trust that someone is doing something you asked them to do, but it’s best to double check and ensure they actually did it |
Turning dead dinosaurs into noise | Burning gas |
Turnover (for watch) | To leave your post only when properly relieved |
Twidget | Nuke ET |
Two Five Stay Alive | 2.5 GPA average often required to graduate certain school houses |
Up on the governor | Need definition |
Ustafish | The name for any submarine in your past "back on ustafish we would..." |
Very well | An official response to being informed of something |
Vitamin M | Motrin |
Voluntold | You were volunteetold to do something |
Vulcan death watch | Some brutal combination of six and four hour watches. These tend to be very grueling periods, hence the “death watches” part of the name |
Waffle stomp | Take a shit in the shower and then attempt to stomp it down the drain to cover your tracks. |
Walking Aux tank | Need definition |
Walking on cans | Need Definition |
Warheads on foreheads | The act of bombing something, or anything involved in the process |
Wash Rack | Need definition |
Wattages on cottages | Same meaning as Warheads on Foreheads |
Weekend warrior | Reservist |
Wheels | Nickname for a Quartermaster, usually given to senior QM onboard |
Who’s who in the zoo | A description of who people are |
Wilco | Will comply |
Wire-biter | Electricians |
Word on the deckplates | Gossip |
Working party | A group of sailors assigned to carry out a large task |
Written in blood | The rules to do or not do something are because somebody got hurt or died doing what you are not supposed to do |
Your shit better be in one sock and not dripping | Something chief says about your accuracy with things |
Zarf | A cup holder |
Zoomies | Radiation / also a term for members of the Air Force |
Source | Information |
---|---|
Goat Locker Navy Slang | General Navy slang terms; pretty thorough resource. Check this one out before you go to the others. |
Quarterdeck | If you’re looking for more standardized definitions like, ‘bow’ or what a ‘keel’ |
Wiktionary Glossary of Military Slang | General Military Slang from all over the world and different services |
Wiktionary Glossary of U.S. Navy Slang | Pretty definitive comprehensive list of internet-compiled Navy slang |
Wiktionary Glossary of U.S. Navy Unit Nicknames | Navy unit nicknames; this page is not well loved, but there are still some good definitions in here |
2015 Business Insider article on Navy terms | Pretty generic article regarding Navy terms, like 'Muster' |
Jalopnik article on USN Submarine | Article with a few good terms from the sub community |
Dictionary of Naval Abbreviations (DICNAVAB) by Bill Wedertz (Apparently the writer of The Bluejackets’ Manual) | I didn't actually get my hands on a copy, but it is a printed hardcopy version of this from years past. |
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